


Set Free

by Kakasakufangirl



Category: Gothika (2003)
Genre: Astraphobia, Atychiphobia, Claustrophobia, Dysfunctional Family, F/M, Father Figures, Father-Daughter Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Ghosts, Glossophobia, Insomnia, Koumpounophobia, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Monophobia, Mysophobia, Nyctophobia, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Taphophobia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-12
Updated: 2016-03-15
Packaged: 2018-05-26 01:57:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6219148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kakasakufangirl/pseuds/Kakasakufangirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Joanna Grey is on the verge of overcoming her anxieties and phobias as she weekly visits an old friend of her mother's. She tries to cope with the fact that she if often alone and hardly sees her. When she doesn't come home from a week long promised vacation, Joanna starts to worry that her fears my be coming true.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Set Free

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joanna recites some of her one of many phobias in her head and thinks a little bit about the past.

"No no no no no no!" A voice frantically uttered repeatedly as it darted down a corridor and made a sharp left which almost caused them to run into an worker there who was handling a patient. Quickly the girl whispered a silent apology before continuing down the hall. Once she recognised the familiar signs on the walls and sticking out on top of the doorframe, did she slow down.

Her jog turned into a fast pace as she sped up to stand on the outside of the passage door. With minutes left to spare, she shifted on her feet to distract herself from her rambling brain. She would like to go into the office early but her mind screamed at her for thinking such things.

It wanted to be one time, as it was before and as it wanted to be again. The constant compulsion to be on time was just nagging at the back of her mind. It was like she needed no, had to be there at the right moment. No second later, but just on time.

She still had her pre afternoon ritual to do once she got there that consist of her twisting the door six times, all in three hundred-sixty degree angle before she could actually open the door. She had to do it at least six times a week in one month or something bad would happen. Something bad always happened if she didn't do the ritual. It was her way of thinking that she's saving the world by doing this.

Her phycologists doesn't think so. He feels that this has to do with the fact that her mother isn't around a lot. Jo knows why her mother doesn't want to come back to this place anymore. It was because of her father, he died after she was born in a car accident which stained heavily on her mother who was a couple of months pregnant at the time.

Of course when she explained this to her phycologists he didn't believe her which ultrared in some distrust in him that he could actually preform his job efficiently given the circumstances.

The man was an old friend of her mother back when her father was still alive, he helped her cope with the pain and other things. When she spoke about him though, she held him at high standards. Her mother even went so far as to recommend him as her phycologists. She went along with it, trusting in her mother's instints and went to one of his afternoon group session.

It was odd at first, in the beginning of the session he focused way to hard on her and seemed fascinated on comparing how much she resembled her mother. The others in the group were completely surprised by his lack of professionalism, she asked them privately when he excused himself from his office, if he did that often.

By the end of the hour she was fed up with him and left through the door which he followed her and apologized for his actions. She made him promise to have a hundred percent professionalism when they were having sessions, outside of the work she wouldn't mind.

From then on she was fine. He actually helped her get rid of her lesser compulsive disorders and fears which was a huge weight off her shoulders. When her mother recommend the best she did her best.

Sometimes they don't go completely away, they come back with a stong urge like an alcoholic without a drink; she couldn't help but fall off the wagon. It would take days weeks even for him to return her to ground zero where things where fine but not okay as she described the feeling.

Some things haven't gone away even if she tried her hardest to get rid of them. She'd been going to the sessions for two years and yet she still couldn't open any door without twisting the knob six times. It was habitual. Part of her custom and daily routine.

When she wasn't obsessing over doorknobs and things that come in sixes, she was left with her other perfecting everything about her. One of her most complex things about her; oder, restraint, perfection, obedience, structures and schedules. She practically worked to plan out her week on her days off and during the week planned to account what she did on weekends.

Jo loved every second of it, it made her feel completely in control of her life unless her mother came home and then she had to reschedule everything. From the time her mother came back to the time she would leave; usually unexpected surprises frustrated her but when it came to her mother, well she couldn't help it.

Pete, her phycologists, had said that her mother's random schedule would help her stop being so controlling over time. Made her a little more, unpredictable about her choices.

_If only.. ___

Once she reached a familiar hallway she slowed down in her steps to accommodate her composer. With deep calm breathes she glaced down at the knob and then her watch. She had a few minutes to spare so she could do the six knobbed ritual now or she could wait one minute until the clock hit five fifty nine.

It didn't matter whether she did it, either way she would still wait until the clock hit six to go in. It was the hard part about being so compulsive, even if the door was wide open and Pete could see her, she wouldn't go in. He grew accustomed to that and accepted the fact that she wouldn't come in no matter how hard he begged her.

Once she remembered getting delayed by one of Pete's co-workers as they chatted with her about how far he's brought her from her veering distorters and phobias. He went on and on about how good of a phycologists the man was and how she deserved the very best since she comes from the best. Weird for the man to talk about her mother like that but she supposed it was all in good nature.

At the time she wasn't paying attention to her watch and didn't realize that the clock had reach six. Not wanting to be rude and mostly needing to complete the conversation, another complexity of her, she quietly excused herself and headed straight for the office.

When the girl looked at her clock and realised she was a couple minutes late she began to have a panic attack. Thus, she knocked on the door to accumulate for the lost minutes of time she wasted talking to the man.

It was a soft but quick knocking sound that alerted Pete of her presence outside his door. He tried to coax her inside the door where the others where waiting but she refused until she finished her knocking. It was truly a pathetic sight and for the rest of the day she felt embarrassed.

Now she's always on time and never strays from her schedule just so people can't see her break down into a million pieces as her complexion take over her life.

Jo decided to do the ritual now in case something distracted her. She raised her arm to knock on the cool door where Pete and the others where probably waiting for her. As she knocked she could hear the sound of hushed voices talking on the other side. She couldn't quite make out what they said but as soon as they heard the knocking the voices stopped.

The sound of a chair moving backwards and footsteps heading her way echoed in her ears. She took a step back and patiently waited for whoever, most likely Pete, to answer.

She was greeted with the soft smile of a young males with big brown eyes. Her mother always teased him about his boyish looks and bright pink lips. He was leaning on the doorframe as he always did when he knew she wouldn't come in.

"Hey, you ready to come in?" He asked as usual. She could tell part of him hoped that she'd just try to make her way into his office without it being a certain time to come in. She just gave him an all knowing uncofident smile and shrugged.

"You can try to come in if you want to." He ushered.

The man side stepped to show her all of the patients in the room sitting in a half circular shape facing towards one chair where Pete has sat so many times when they talked. The others wore tired or unmoved expressions as they looked at her, all except one girl who was a little older than Jo herself.

She often made rude comments about her psychological state of mind even though she didn't consider her one of them. She looked as if she wanted to say something now as she snickered in the background.

She just looked at the invited chair that was saved just for her. It was right next to a red head who had a fear of germs - Mysophobia, her brain recited. She was the one Jo liked the most, her and another girl with brunette hair who was a little younger than she. The two girls where always nice to her and often explained their...conditions to her.

Laura, the red head, was about the same age as her but she was going there for an entire different reason that she was. Laura was trapped in a small coffin with no light for days at a time by her father. His actions resulted in her having a fear of being buried alive because no matter how hard she pushed against the wooden pallets and how loud she screamed, she couldn't get out. It gave her the sense of being buried alive.

Sonia, was afraid of the dark. She had been since she was a little girl. Her parents weren't always around to help her if she had a nightmare or was scared so the girl stayed up all night to watch in case any monsters under her bed or in the closet came out. That only make the condition worse. While she didn't grow out of the fear with age she did develop a bad case of insomnia.

"I...I-I can't." She stuttered out as she took another step back. Pete gave her a disappointed look which really hurt because she hated to disappoint people, especially people she knew.

"I'm sorry." Her voice was small and timid. She was afraid one day that the man would just loose it and pull her though the threshold one day out of annoyance but that fear was always pushed away when he gave her an encouraging smile.

"That's okay. We'll work on that." He encouraged her with a small smile and a light hand on her shoulder before making his way back towards his seat.

She just stood there as the others continued their session until six came and then she walked into the room with a sigh of relief. As she sat down in her own chair she could hear Florence pretend to cough as she utter names about her under her breath.

"Now that we're all here-..." Pete was interrupted by Florence loud cough as the word freak was uttered under her breath. He frowned and was about to say something when Jo just shook her head. The more he gave her attention, the more she would do it. "As I was saying, now that we are all together...let's begin."

  


~ • ~

  


"Alright everyone, I want you all to keep up with your practices and try not to push yourselves. It takes a long time to get over a fear but I'm sure with enough endurance you all can get better at controlling it." He looked around the room and gave each and everyone of them his reassuring smiles. "Hopefully, for some of you, not too controlling on it."

That put a smile on her face. He always knew what to say that could help them all feel a little more down to earth, perhaps even normal. "Alright ladies, you may go now. You are no longer restricted to bare my presence any longer." He stated jokingly.

Jo gathered up her things and prepared to leave. Her mother said she'd pick her up today. They were going out for their annual or monthly Mother-Daughter day as her mom put it. Helped strengthen the bond or whatnot. The girl didn't understand why their bond needed to be 'strengthened', she felt it was just fine the way it was.

Lauren and Sonia waited for her on the outside of the office for them to walk together and discuss their thoughts on the session. Even though it would be a short discussion, she enjoyed talking to people outside of school, her mom and Pete. She didn't really have friends, more like associates that were kind of outcasts to society.

"So how do you guys feel the sessions are doing?" She asked first. Not out of complexity but genuine curiosity. They never wanted to start conversations over the status of how everyone was dealing with their problems. It was kind of like rating who's the craziest of them all type of thing.

"I think it's going well. I see Piper's doing well with the whole storm fear. I could actually see her getting better faster than the rest of us that's for sure." Lauren stated.

In a way she was kind of setting herself up for failure by saying that but Jo couldn't blame her. She had also once doubted their being any hope of being cured of her fears as well but that was before she started the group sessions. She agreed to what the girl was saying along with Sonia, who was always quite when it came to these types of conversations.

She hardly ever spoke unless spoken to but even then it was one word that consisted in the range of: yes or no. She did, however like to speak quietly to Pete whenever they had single sessions.

"You might be surprised at how far we've all come." Jo said, trying to keep things positive for a change. Somehow their conversations always resorted in to negative dark themes on how the group was progressing. "I mean look at us. A year ago we wouldn't even talk to each other let alone look at each other. I call that progress. Even, Florence, the negative nancy she is was participating quite well."

"You mean by calling us all freaks and psychopaths that belong in a circus then proceeding to mock each of our fears?" The red head asked as they all rounded a corner.

"My point exactly. A year ago she refused to even participate in those activities. She would just sit in a corner far away from the group and glare at everyone, that was creepy. Now she's just mean. I can deal with mean girls." She proclaimed.

"Your helping your case." Sonia said. If she were any quieter, Jo was pretty sure she wouldn't have heard her comment.

The three walked down a couple of steps as the door to the outside was just a few feet ahead of them. "All I'm saying is that everyone has done so much to get were they are now, we can't give up on ourselves. We can still be...normal."

Once they reached the exits both girls opened either side of the doubled doors just so Lauren didn't have to. While she was doing that, Jo was pushing the handle another five times. She gave them each a grateful smile as they walked out and into the parking lot.

As they sat down by the steps someone hooked an arm around her shoulder and pulled her back. The same thing happened to Sonia as they both turned to see Florence just sitting there behind them.

"What are our three favorite psychos talking about today? Hmm, I wonder." She said in feign curiosity. That made both Jo and Sonia take her arms off of their shoulder. "Could they be rating how screwed up in the head everyone in our happy family is or could they actually be doing something none predicable."

 _See, even she realises how messed up it is to talk about who's sick and who's not._

Lauren rolled her eyes. "If that's the best acting you can do then you might want to change your career into something more relatable like being a Dictator. You know the ones kind of like Hitler but more evil."

"El camarada, do not insult Adolfo Hitler like that." Her beautiful soft language flew out of her mouth like a bird taking to the air for the first time. She then proceeds to turn towards the older girl with a smile. "You'd make a very nice dictador." She teased.

"How cute, Dora the Explorer is going to give us a lesson on how to say Hitler in Spanish. You all are pathetic." As she said that she pushed past them and got into her car. She was probably the only one of them old enough to even have a car. They had to wait on someone to pick them up unfortunately.

Jo looked up at the sky. The clouds darkened in color giving this harsh dull grey look which did not help with her mood today. Little droplets of rain fell to the ground as the wind picked up the pace. A flash of lighting in the distance caught her eye as the sound of thunder cracked into her ears only seconds later. It was going to storm on her relatively positive parade and she didn't think that Christmas could come any sooner than it did.

Contrary to most beliefs, she actually liked when it stormed. It helped her sleep at night when the long days of insomnia were catching up with her. She would go days without sleep, finally crash, rest up and do it all over again the next week or so. Her mother said it wasn't a healthy lifestyle for her to pick up at suck a young age. Well tell that to the long essays and reports she had to do in school.

"Okay cool, gag me later!" The red head called out. She was in an irritable move and would strike down anyone in her path at the moment. "It looks as if it's about to storm, you guys want a lift?" She asked as her father's car pulled up.

Sonia nodded and utter a silent 'thanks' under her breathe as she entered the car. Lauren looked over towards Jo expectantly. "No thanks, my Mom said she'd be here in a few. Hopefully before the rain really starts pouring down."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'll talk to you later okay." Jo just wanted the day to be over and forget for a while that she didn't come here and disscuss her problems with a shrink. With that being said they were gone and once again she was left to her own devices.

She knew her mother wouldn't be long. For some reason or another she always took the long way to this place and never over the bridge that would literally kill a lot of time. The woman was a mystery case of her own. She always had secrets that she didn't share, not even with her own daughter.

Her mother had been that way most of her life; always keeping little parts of herself a secret and never specifying in details about the things that happened in the past. It was frustrating the least but understandable. Some people think that releasing the skeletons in their closests are worst than keeping them hidden.

There weren't many people from her mother's past that she still talked about. Her father was no exception. She barley knew anything about him besides the small fact that he died before she was born. She had a picture of him from her mother's old junk box. It was a photo of them in their wedding clothes.

She looked so happy back then. Now she just worked herself to death and went of weeks on end business trips. She always came back looking a little worse for wear and even though she just came back, a few days later she was back at it again.

Sure Jo felt lonely coming home to a house with just her living in it but that was to be expected when she grew up right. She'd be on her own anyways. Though it would be nice if they could have a couple of dinners together without her mother jumping in the car for her next roar trip.

The sound of an umbrella opening up made her jump. She quickly turned around to face Pete just standing there with a somewhat gentle smile. She frowned. While she did lose her train of thought she didn't lose her manners. "Hello Dr. Graham." He seemed amused about something which annoyed her to no end. "Is there something funny?"

"No it's just, you remind me of your mother. Always so jumpy when it came to tiny noises popping up behind her." He stated creepily. Jo just faked a smiled as she looked away praying that her mother wouldn't be too long.

When she didn't look as if she was going to say anything more he continued the conversation himself. "So how is Miranda doing?" He asked.

It wasn't that Pete was a creepy guy, he just made her feel uncomfortable with his extremely intense looks that he gave her. Like he was studying every twich and mistake she made. Well to her, most people looked at her the way as if she would just die on sight.

"Um, Dr. Graham...I don't feel comfortable discussing my personal life with my psychologist right after our session today. Its makes me feel like we're crossing some kind of privacy barrier." Jo tried to explain to him carefully that didn't indicated that she thought that he was strange.

"Well we're not in session right now. Right now I'm just Pete Graham who is very persistent in having a perfectly normal conversation with you."

"Yes, yes you are very persistent." The girl noted quietly. Immediately she regretted the word as soon as they left her mouth. Pete gave her an complex look.

"I can see that I am making you uncomfortable so I'll just leave."

"No! It's not that!" She grabbed his arm to provent him from leaving. "How about we just ignore that whole first conversation and start over. Hello Dr.-Pete. How are you?"

Of course starting the whole conversation was the only viable option for her. When things got too messy in her head she had to start over or it wouldn't be as perfect. Jo was sort of a perfectionist. It one of many pet peeves she had develop over the years and it's only gotten worse.

No matter how stupid the conversation may start like, he still presented her with the same welcomed smile as he did before. Pete was like that. Always smiling and grinning and telling cheesy jokes but when things got serious he could keep a relatively cool head on his shoulders.

"I'm fine Jo. How's your mother doing today?"

"I wouldn't know you know. She never actually tells me these things. If she was dying of a heart attack right now I wouldn't even know that she was sick. In fact, when she's not on some work related job, she's cooped up in her room doing whatever it is she does." She ranted.

Of all the things she said that could've freaked him out and didn't, this was the conversation that did. Pete just whistled. "Okay then I see you two have a lot to talk about."

That gave her an idea. Maybe if someone else that her mother knew came over and had a chat with her, then maybe dinner could be this much more tolerable. They wouldn't have to dance around each other as they sat at the table uncomfortably.

"You know what, you should drop by tonight."

"Oh, I don't think-"

"I insist! You, Mom and me could catch up on lost time and have the big old dinner I'm sure she cooked to apologize for not being here." Jo could feel the plan hatching in her head. "But we'd have to catch her before she runs off on her next adventure."

"Jo have you ever tried telling your mother this." He said trying to change the subject.

"No but that doesn't matter because she wouldn't listen anyways."

As stubborn as she was she only figure her mother was a lost more harder to deal with. Everything was hereditary so long sleepless nights were probably her fault.

"I think she would."

"Would you still like to come over for dinner?"

"I don't know Jo...Miranda and I haven't seen each other in so long. I think I'd bring back some painful memories in her life that she'd like to forget, plus Ihave a lot of files to go over...at...home."

"II'll try to make it. If I'm not too busy."

She could see her mother vehicle pull up towards the building as she walked down the steps with Pete in tow. He still had his umbrella raised like a gentleman as they walked towards the sidewalk.

It was still raining only it started to come down harder. The sound echoed in their ears loudly. Every drop of liquid against the hard surfaces circumferences of the area.

"Thanks Pete." A car pulled up with a window slowly going down. Miranda leaned over in her seat to wave at her daughter and the man standing next to her. "Anyways my rides here. See you tonight, maybe?"

"Maybe. Hello Miranda." With a wave of her hand it sent him away. Pete smiled at them both before heading towards his own car which was parked a few feet away from them.

**Author's Note:**

> These are some of the fears listed and what they mean:
> 
> Astraphobia - The fear of thunder/lightning.  
> Claustrophobia - The fear of small spaces.  
> Mysophobia - The fear of germs.  
> Glossophobia - The fear of public speaking.  
> Monophobia - The fear of being alone.  
> Atychiphobia - The fear of failure.  
> Nyctophobia - The fear of darkness.  
> Koumpounophobia - The fear of buttons.  
> Taphophobia - The fear of being buried alive.
> 
> These are all fears, I'm not making this up. Plus I thought the fear of buttons one was pretty cute. Anyone who has this fear, your adorable. ;-)


End file.
